Funny Blonde Jokes

101 Blonde Jokes -[ Home - Dumb - Clean - Dirty - Funny Blonde Jokes ]-

Q: How many stupid blondes does it take to make a circuit?
A: Two - one to stand inside the bath, the other to pass the hair dryer.

Q: What's the diff between a blonde and a computer?
A: You only have to punch information into a computer once.

Q: Did you hear about the dumb blonde couple that were found frozen to death in their car at a drive-in movie theater?
A: They went to see "Closed for the Winter".

Q: What's a dumb Blondes favorite rock group?
A: Air Supply.

Q: Why is it okay for blondes to catch a cold?
A: No need for em to worry about blowing their brains out.

She was so blonde she fell for these Crazy Pranks & Hilarious Gags - great pranks for playing on your blond friends :)

Q: What do blondes and cow-pats have in common?
A: The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.

Q: How did the blonde die drinking milk?
A: The cow fell on top of her.

Q: What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet?
A: Last year's hide and seek champion.

Q: Why did the blonde keep a coat hanger in her back seat?
A: In case she locks the keys in her car.

Q: What does a postcard from a blonde's vacation say?
A: Having a fantastic time. Where am I?

Q: How do you keep a blonde in suspense?
A: Present her with a mirror and tell her to wait for the other person to say "Hello"

Q: Why are blonde's immune to Mad Cow Disease?
A: It only affects the brain.

Q: How can you tell if a blonde is a natural blonde?
A: Blow in her ear - if natural, watch as she floats...

Q: What do you call blonde twins doing bubble gum commercials?
A: Double-dumb.

Q: Where do you look for blonde's obituaries?
A: Under "Home Improvements."

Q: Why did the blonde go to the rehab center?
A: Because she thought she was hooked on phonics.

Q: What is foreplay for a blonde?
A: 30 mins of begging.

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and an ironing board?
A: It's quite difficult opening the legs of an Ironing Board.

Q: What do you call 4 blondes lying on the ground?
A: An air mattress.

Ringtones

Q: What would you do if a Blond threw a hand grenade right at you?
A: You'd pull the pin and throw it back.

Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
A: Run like hell....she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.

Q: What's the difference between a pit bull and a blonde with PMS?
A: Lipstick.

Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a Mercedes?
A: You don't lend the Merc out to your friend.

Q: What do a bowling ball and a blonde have in common?
A: Sooner or later they'll both end up in the gutter.

Q: Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?
A: She didn't want to waken the sleeping pills.

Q: How many blondes does it take to play tag?
A: One.

Q: Why are dumb blonde jokes so short?
A: So brunettes can remember them.

Q: What is the definition of gross ignorance?
A: 144 blondes.

Q: How do you make a blonde laugh on Monday mornings?
A: Tell them a joke on Friday night.

Posters

Q: How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves?
A: She fell out of the tree.

Q: How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?
A: Wave to her.

Q: Why do blondes wear shoulder pads?
A: (With a rocking of the head from side to side) Well...Like, I dunno!

Q: What's the difference between a smart blonde and the Yeti?
A: Yeti has been spotted.

Q: Do you know why the blonde got fired from the M&M factory?
A: For throwing out the W's.

Q: What did they name the offspring of a blonde and a Puerto Rican?
A: Retardo.

Q: How does a blonde commit suicide?
A: She gathers her clothes into a pile and jumps off.

Q: Why is the blonde's brain the size of a pea in the morning?
A: It swells at night.

Q: How do you confuse a blonde?
A: You don't. They're born that way.

Q: Why do blondes work seven days a week?
A: So you don't have to retrain them on Monday.

It's with great sadness that I tell you my blonde girlfriend burned her nose last night....she was bobbing for french fries...

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